Unconditional Love is hard to find, and even harder to hold onto. But it is definitely possible!
I was reminded of this several times over the weekend and it was summed up beautifully by a line in the movie JUNO last night. It said something like: ( and I am taking a lot of liberties here, because I didn't have a pen and paper, but you'll get the gist)
JUNO: Is it possible that people can stay together?
JUNO'S DAD: Yes, when you find someone who loves you exactly as you are. The good, The bad, The ugly, What you do, What you say, How you behave, What you look like..........etc
The MC Breaks Loose
It moved me to think about my own relationship and about the fact that The MC made a complete fool of himself on the dance floor at my cousins wedding on the weekend. A fool in all the best possible ways. It was hysterical and the entire room was laughing and cheering by the time he finished.
Picture a 40 year old man with his very own version of contemporary dance, a little hip hop, and a dash of salsa. The bridal table held up score cards and gave an average of 7.5 out of ten. Not bad for unrehearsed and no formal training. He is a business professional, not a dancer by any stretch :) AND HYSTERICAL!
At first I wanted to hide and pretend he was someone else's husband. 'Surely this will reflect badly on me in some way.' my mind screamed. I came over all selfconscious. Then suddenly I let all that go and found that what I actually felt was a profound and unconditional love for him. What made me love him in that moment was his courage and his ability to laugh at himself in front of a room full of people. I could never do that!
It is a wonderful man and father that can do this and demonstrate to his teenage kids (especially a teenage son) that courage is not about physical strength and bravado, or about getting pissed and getting in a fight as often happens at occasions where large amounts of alcohol is consumed. It shows that it is OK to have a laugh at your own expense and that being silly in public is sometimes a great experience for others too.
Dancing with him meant that I too could let go of "Looking good" and worrying about what others would think of me.
One Lovely Bridesmaids Tale
When it was time for the speeches one of the bridesmaids began by having a laugh at the brides expense, talking about her weird habits and personality traits. It was a little uncomfortable at first and everyone wondered where it was heading. And then she said the most amazing thing. She spoke about the time my cousin (the bride) stood between her and her partner as he was trying to hit her. She said it was then that she knew what sort of person my cousin really is. And that she would love her for that quality for ever more.
Unconditional love comes not only from being able to laugh at yourself, but also in the ability to see qualities in others where you might not normally look because you are distracted by 'yourself '.
When you can give up what it means about you, you can really see what it says about them.
Congratulations Caylie and PJ. Thank you for a lovely evening and for sharing it with us. May your unconditional love last forever. xxx
Davia
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